Miranda's Illicit Affairs And Encounters

One thing a lot of people have become used to with the event of social networking sites like Facebook is that the Internet is predominately free. So what justifications do dating sites have to charge for their services? In theory this article can be applied not only to illicit relationship type dating sites but to any dating site that charges.

Think about this you don’t have to pay to speak to someone on MSN messenger/yahoo chat or any other IM so why pay on these sites. ?

Well they say that they are vetting profiles and also by charging it is an exclusive club.!  To quote a site

“.. is the only site that that polices female  members to ensure there are no undesirables etc. We know they join other sites where they’re not  checked.” or “we have a department dedicated to vetting the site for scammers” or “Our site is policed and monitored” .

Basically it’s what you say in the trade “a load of balls”

 I wonder how many men are posing as women are on these sites just to get free access ? 

So much for the vetting process. All sites even free ones vet there members and monitor and police their sites. Why ?

becuase :-

a) They want to keep other members happy and keep them on the site.

b) They want to ensure there’s nothing dodgy going on

c) They want prospective members who browse the site to know they are serious about it.

The other favourite one they tend to use is:-

“By making our members pay we are getting a higher quality of member”  and another “The best quality men are on our site becuase they do pay a premium”.

Yet again most people who join these sites are  on other sites. Its the old case of  “the more you spread you wings the better chance you have of succeeding”. In reality, the quality across all sites is the same in  that there are high medium and low quality members. I suppose it depends on how you measure quality but basically all site follow what is called in mathematics the binomial distribution or bell shape curved when it comes to their members.

To quote a female member on one of the paying sites (where men pay)  who has moved over to a free site.

“I got hastled by men continually who sent me emails again and again and tried instant messaging with me mainly because they payed lots and felt they had to get there money’s worth………….. It really pissed me off”

“Since I moved over to a free site, I find the men are so much more relaxed and not as stressed out as they are on other pay sites, and they are in less of a hurry…”

On alot of these sites generally women go free and also they say their site is free but really it is not. A good way of finding out is to check out the sites Frequently asked questions (i.e FAQ) its normally hidden in there, or in their help. Be astounded by their fees and it’s the men who pay.

Another great one is join us “we have the most women on our site or an even male to female ratio”. Well its a known fact that there are more men on the net than women. I’m sure there are all sorts of tricks one could potentially use, to boost female numbers. Not that I’m saying any sites use these tactics. Fake profiles is one, Joining chat rooms and profiles together with other sites to make it look like the numbers are bigger. One thing I’ve found and same again you “can’t tar all sites with the same brush” is that, just as your payed account has expired, you get an email from another member. Which of course you can’t read unless you upgrade again.

“Free sites don’t have the same amount of people because they don’t have huge amount to spend on marketing”. Well if free sites charged what the pay sites charged then obviously they would be able to market in the same way. There is however more than one way to market a site and in the end the free site if its good will prevail. Why because of critical mass and the “tipping point”. once the site has recommendations and “word of mouth” increases, the search engines ranking increases and it becomes more visible. So if you go for a free site and it has less members hang around and watch it grow and of course send anonymous mails to other potential members if they have that option!!  Also talking about the site on other forums and commenting on published articles all helps.

Also they say “free sites are scams” to try and make them look bad. I’m sure some are but I think pay sites are scams and rip offs!!

Another one they use is we only have “real men and women on our site”. Yet again all sites have real men and women on there as well as their share of bogus scammers. Any site that says they are totally scammer free or don’t have bogus profiles must have some great system of finding them out which nobody is able to come up with!!

Another great one is we have over 250,000 or 500,000 members which is probably true and makes you think wow there is alot of people on that site. In reality you’ll probably find there are that many people registered but in reality only about 300-800 are actually active. So you spend hours looking at people who are not interested any more. 

Finally offering free membership to anyone who find’s scammers,and undersirables is perhaps an admission that there possibly could be these sort of people on the site. Lets face it scammers etc are like junk mail they are there and we are always trying to get rid of them what ever site your are using.

Sometimes they may employ financial gain to try and tempt you to sign up new members. I have seen anything up ot £40 to date. Bare in mind that if they can afford to give you this then they have to recoup the cost somehow and normally its through high membership fees.

 What the other site don’t realise is some people have been beavering away to change the face of dating and are doing it for free using a more up to date business model. So my advice to you is:

 ”Not Women go free men pay” but “women go free and men go free” and the site is free unless you want to pay!!! If you do pay there is no discrimination against men both genders pay. We feel it’s more “gender equitable” to coin a phrase.

Well that’s precisely what they do on one site called loveisthebug.com.  It is becoming a bit of a phenomena in dating as it’s different and yes its free.